To Be Loved; How it all began… by Corina

File Mar 24, 11 58 45 PM

I believe that you can be successful and not fruitful. You can be busy and not productive. You can be serving and not sowing seeds.

 

You can be a mission trip going, church attending, theology studying Christian and not know God.

 

And this is scary.

 

My name is Corina, I have been a Christian my entire life, and I didn’t know God. If I am being completely honest, I was spending more time telling others about His love, His grace, and His freedom and I wasn’t experiencing it for myself.

 

Living in a Christian community and attending church on Sundays means I had a whole lot of factual knowledge about God. Not to mention the bible and theology classes that I took for my degree. I thought I knew God. Or at least enough to do what He called me to do.

 

Everything changed for me one night after asking a few mentors of mine for advice on my purpose.

 

“So how do I really know if God is calling me to do something?

What if I do the wrong thing?

What if God spoke to me and I miss it and I never do what I am called to do?”

 

These were normal questions that everyone around me was asking. These were questions that I had spent hours praying about, asking the Lord to make sure that I was doing EXACTLY what He created me to do. I told Him that I wouldn’t do anything unless He called me to do it. I even said that I would sacrifice everything I had to do something great for Him.

 

You know the whole,

 

“break my heart for what breaks yours Jesus! All I am is yours!” prayer. Yeah, I prayed it.

 

Everyday.

 

At this point in my life I was starting my final year of college, I was approved to be a real life missionary which was what I had dreamed of since freshman year. Still, I wasn’t satisfied. I was asking God to use me for more and to give me bigger dreams.

 

I feared that if I wasn’t doing something that made me sacrifice everything and required every waking moment of my day, I was doing something wrong.

 

 

I sat on that couch that night with my mentors and after I finished drilling them with questions about what God wanted for my life, the Husband of the couple responded.

 

And I  wasn’t expecting the response I received.

 

“Corina, maybe God is trying to remove the lust out of your heart to do great things, have a platform, and reach millions. Maybe He just wants you to know Him.”

 

I was shocked to say the least. I left that night, got in my car, put the key in, turned on the most dramatic worship song I could find, and I cried.

 

Alot. (Like the nasty snot on your face cry.)

 

For the first time in my life, I realized that I was being pursued by a God who wanted absolutely nothing from me, except that I know Him.

 

When you get to know God you learn that His love is aggressive, offensive, and overwhelming to everything you think you know about Him and about who you are. It changes the way you see, hear, and speak.

 

His Love changes everything.

 

I have so much more that I would love to share with you. This story and this adventure with the God who loves me is just getting started. But for now, I want to encourage you to be loved. Drop everything and ask God to show you what He really wants from you. It won’t be a just calling, a purpose, or a plan, but instead an invitation to sit with Him, know Him, and to be loved by Him.

 

“Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.” 1 John 4:7

XO, Corina

11 thoughts on “To Be Loved; How it all began… by Corina

  1. I am so encouraged by reading these words of how God is moving in the lives of his daughters! It is so easy to get wrapped up in serving God without spending time getting to know him! Thank you for reminding me to spend time in his presence and just be!

  2. It's so easy to get caught up in who the world wants us to be, but I often neglect who God wants me to be, in Him. Thank you for this blog that speaks through the Lord to remind me that simply loving and knowing Him surpasses anything I do or accomplish in this world.

  3. This was such an awakening for me. As I continued reading, I began to realize, wow, this is me!! All I ever want to do is to please my Lord, but how do I even do that when I dont even know Him like I should? I believe that I somehow thought that by doing incredible things-by going to mission trips and being involved, it was the only way to please Him. Truth is, all God wants me to do is to let go, know and love Him. An intimate relationship with God to me is being vulnerable and comtorable with God. Comtorable in the since where you dont have to try to be sonething or someone, or by trying to impress Him by actions or words you say. Its letting your walls down when you want to keep building them up. Its doing the small things when you thought you would be doing incredible things. Serving God is when you continually, constantly and consistently put Him as the reason why you woke up that day and the only reason why you live. To me taking time to know God is when you want to know Him, but He isnt the first priority in your life. Its like somthing alot of christian collage students struggle with. First is exercise, then work, then homework, and finally after all is done and you have 5 minutes to spare, so you read youre Bible verse of the day, which your likely not going to remeber the next day. Being a Christian isnt easy and was never intended to be, and we will never have all the answers but one thing that I know, is that throught it all, He will never change His mind about me, leave me nor forsake me and no one, including myself will ever get in the way of me knowing and loving God. I believe getting to know God is a journey on its self and im going to enjoy it until I go home. Thank you!

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